Archives

Healing my Anxiety – now FREE on Amazon Kindle

Dear Readers,

As a thank you for your continued support I’d like to let you know about my free book promotion. From June 16 – 20th you may download the book on Amazon Kindle. Please download, re-tweet, re-blog and share the word with your network. I’m looking forward to a successful promotion and appreciate your efforts.

Download now and enjoy your read!

Advertisements

An Excerpt from Healing My Anxiety – A Memoir

An excerpt from Healing My Anxiety:

Healing My AnxietyI read that many people have their first panic attack come on suddenly, out of the blue. 

 It starts while they are watching TV, having a meal, or simply relaxing. In March 2002 I experienced some chest pain. Back then I lived in a small but prosperous country town in New South Wales with my de facto husband and my daughter from a previous marriage. I was 33 years old.

A moment in time: I am lying on a bed in the emergency department, staring at the ceiling and promising myself to change my lifestyle, to lose weight. I am scared, but hopeful. I have never had any serious health problems.

I tried, but I didn’t persist with my efforts. It was not only extra weight that I was carrying. I found that often before a significant medical issue comes up we get a warning of some sort. There is still time to do something, but often it is ignored or dismissed…

My life became a nightmare. I was getting sick as often as every 10 minutes…

Make sure you don’t miss out click here to download the full ebook on Amazon Kindle.

My Life as a Nutcase – By Vivienne Mathews

Vivienne MathewsIt’s like living in a glass dome, one that maintains a permanent perimeter just inside your front door. Others can pass through this invisible barrier at will, but not you. For you, it’s a constant reminder of your limitations and you have a primal aversion to bumping into it, lest the whole thing shatter and come down on your head. It’s walking through a grocery store and pretending you don’t feel as if every passerby is holding a gun at eye level. It’s loneliness and it’s craving time to yourself. It’s wanting desperately to connect with people and at the same time feeling paralyzed by a chronic sense of doom whenever they’re around. It’s repeated situations in which an old friend will show up on your radar and you’ll scramble over yourself to invite them out, only to have that last word fall like a guillotine when you finally realize what you’ve said…. Out.

What were you thinking?

“Maybe I’ll call them back,” you say to yourself. Explain to them that “See, well, the thing is… I can’t so much leave my house. And oh, by the way, I’ll have a panic attack if you walk through my door, so can you just drive by and sit on the other side of my window so I can howl at you like a housecat with nothing better to do? Catch up that way?”

This is the illogical mess of suckage that is agoraphobia – and I’m soaking in it.

At least these days I can talk about my little problem without fear of being labeled a nutcase. More and more, society’s understanding and acceptance of mental illness expands to where things like this don’t need to be kept in the shadows. They are recognized for the hitches in biology that they are, rather than flaws in character. That helps, more than people may know.

If I could say anything to those in my position it would be this.

  1. Have compassion for yourself.
  2. You will have good days, and you will have bad. Live your good days to their fullest and remember that the bad days don’t make you any less of a person.
  3. Know that you have worth beyond your aversions. What you have to offer that won’t be hindered by fear, not for long.
  4. You won’t always be in control and that’s okay.
  5. You won’t always understand yourself and that’s even better, because if there’s anything worth learning more about, it’s the human condition.
  6. Most importantly… open the blinds when you least want to. Let the sun remind you that it’s still shining, whether or not you care to look.

As we speak, I am treating my agoraphobia with a cocktail of medication, hard-bitten pep talks, and the most supportive husband red hair can buy. I take comfort in my backyard beehives — they give me a reason to step outside and breathe the wind and I often feel safer in my protective white suit than I do in these four walls. And I write. By putting a bit of myself in my palm and reaching beyond the barrier, I’ve found a way to say, “This is me. I am here. And I haven’t forgotten that you are there, either.”

Vivienne Mathews
Author of The Sons of Masguard
Visit my Blog
Follow me on Twitter
Or find me on Smashwords

THINGS THAT MAKE ME FEEL GOOD

You cannot  impose happiness on yourself. You cannot become happy just by following all the rules prescribed in self-development books, however there are things one can do to improve their qualify of life and therefore their levels of satisfaction.

Recently Martin Seligman visited Australia and I was lucky to attend his lecture at Sydney Opera House. Did you read his books? You can check out his website where he lists things you can do to improve your levels of happiness/life satisfaction.

I have decided to write down a list of things that make me feel good ( no huge discoveries here, perhaps, but hopefully  you will find something useful).

WAKING UP ON SATURDAY TO A SUNNY, BUT NOT HOT DAY

SMELL OF FRESHLY MADE COFFEE

LOOKING AT THE FLOWERS, ESPECIALLY ROSES

PROLONG HUGS AND KISSES

MEAL SERVED ON A TRAY IN BED WHEN I AM TOO TIRED

LOOKING AT THE PICTURES OF PEOPLE I LOVE

LISTENING TO “SIMPLY BEING” APP ON MY PHONE

MY NEW HTC ONE M7 PHONE WITH BATTERY THAT LASTS

PINK THINGS

HELLO KITTY MERCHANDISE (NO, I AM NOT A COLLECTOR)

PHOTOS OF CUTE PUPPIES

LUXURY TRAVEL MAGAZINES

FRESH SUNDAY PAPER

GOOD QUALITY ENGLISH BREAKFAST TEA FOR BREAKFAST

WARM SOURDOUGH BREAD WITH BUTTER

WATERMELON

GOAT FETTA

ORGANIC RICOTTA

KALE SALAD

RED CAVIAR

BELLINI COCKTAIL

CHAMPAGNE

BROWN BROTHERS (AUSTRALIA) WINES

BEING NEAR THE WATER ON A WARM SUNNY DAY

BEING IN A BEAUTIFUL GARDEN

LOOKING AT THE PICTURES WITH VIEWS OF ITALY, SOUTH OF FRANCE AND ALPS

DISNEYLAND

UNIVERSAL STUDIOS

STAR TREK

WARM HEAVY BLANKET ON A COLD NIGHT

PEACE AND QUIET.

What about you?

Words for Susan Jeffers

Years ago I read “Feel the fear and do it anyway” by Susan Jeffers. This is a ground-breaking book by well known American author. In my book “Healing my anxiety” I describe how this book and Susan’s relaxation tracks helped me when my anxiety was at it’s worst. I am a subscriber to Susan’s newsletter. A short while ago I was shocked to learn that Susan passed away from rare form of cancer. On YouTube I watched an interview with her recorded in July 2012  – no one would have guessed she was ill. I guess she was a private person and didn’t want to publicize it. RIP Susan, you are missed greatly!!